Bali was our first destination on our honeymoon tour. It is where I was promised we could recover, read and sloth out! After the crazy stress of moving continents (from Japan to Brazil), learning a new language, surviving the first year in my wife’s home country, and four-wedding marathon to boot, well, I deserved this. It was like reaching the top of Fuji: it’s ugly getting there, but God, does it look sexy from the top.

Bali is the Hindu hold out of the mostly Muslim Indonesian archipelago. We opted out of a beach stay in Bali and decided on Ubud, the hill side town, where Elizabeth Gilbert’s (aka Eat, Pray, Barf) Balinese medicine man Ketut hails.

Ditching the crowds for the mountains and rice paddies of Ubud made all the difference as it was so much more lower key.

Our first expedition outside of hotel paradise was with Bali Go Bike. A bike tour company run by Ketut (not Gilbert’s Medicine Man, shucks) and his brothers. Ketut was all kinds of awesome. He really puts himself into his tour and his pride for Ubud is unmatched. The guy smiled smiled smiled. When we got off the bikes here and there to pee, drink, and mostly take photos- which would make me nuts if I were a guide, he calmly gave us a smile and had a cigarette. At first I thought Ketut meant chill in Balinese, but really it simply meant that he is the fourth child and youngest in his family.

Back to the ride. We started the ride literally in a cloud at, near, or on top of a volcano (still not sure which) and road our bikes all the way down, taking our time, hopping potholes here and there, and quietly breathing in the air and life of rice patties, terraced hills, jungle paradise, and festive villages.

Rice patty and terrace.

This is where coconuts go to die, found on the side of the road.

All of Bali was in the middle of celebrating Galungan, the Hindu equivalent of new years with the family and preparations for Christmas. We couldn’t have happened on a better day for the ride, as women carried offerings and food platters to their various celebrations and temples, in every one of the 16 mini-decorated villages we rode through.

Giant hand made bamboo structures decorated the streets in each town.

One of our stops was a coffee plantation where they had a variety coffees and teas produced and prepared right there on the grounds (pun intended). One of their specialties is Kopi-Luwak or civet coffee: made from the digested coffee beans “produced” (or shat) by the animal, collected by workers, washed (thank god), then sun dried and lightly roasted–you know, to keep in the special flavors of the civet’s digestive tract.

Roasting civet beans.

Kopi-Luwak is one of the most expensive coffees in the world. After the Civet drops his load, laborers gather (a few at a time) and then wash, sun dry, lightly roast the coffee and so on. The beans are discharged in clumps often having some of the coffee berry membranes still attached to the beans–which are still intact. There is something good knowing that people pay good money for coffee that comes out of a creepy animal’s ass.

Being my first cup of civet coffee I expected it to be more rich, with a hint of turd, and really have more of a distinct aroma, but civet coffee is supposed to be more smooth. It was good but I expected more from all the hype. Then it struck me, this was farmed civet coffee. There is a theory that civets in nature produce better grains. In nature, out of the cage, they  would naturally have the freedom to hunt for the best coffee berries and therefore produce a better quality coffee. If it is farmed, the civets have no choice what berries they poop and only eat and shit what they are given. In the wild they would have choice in berry selection, and the process would differentiate and lead to better quality.

Either way it was a good cup of Joe.

Some people say after a good coffee, “Oh man, this coffee is the SHIT!” And this really was. It was delightful. Check out my shit drinking grin! Ketut on the right.

After more terraces, photo breaks, and many sips of water we came to the end of the ride.

The tour led directly to Ketut’s compound, a home with open air rooms, their own temple, and lots of space where we sit or lay on the floor and soak it all in.

His entire family graciously welcomed us over for an amazing buffet and encouraged us to explore their home, which felt more like a palace with hand carved wooden doors, and pillars painted in gold and red.

It was a lovely home and were treated as friends of the family.

Peanut sauce chicken, mixed vegetables, and shredded chicken over rice.

Outside Ketut’s home.

Yes, those are life size statues of a tiger and a bear.

Nerds.

Ibu Oka is one of the most famous food joints on the entire island of Bali– located in a touristy area of Ubud, Ibu Oka serves some of the best suckling pig. Anthony Bourdain has been here, as have many other food celebrities. Since we stayed around Kuta, the drive was about an hour. I was told we have to go before noon, otherwise the good stuff runs out.

We arrived around 11:45am, and it wasn’t crowded.

As I was walking in, I saw this beautifully roasted as. Since I am not a celebrity, I couldn’t go to back to see the cooking process.

Although you can’t see it, they stuff a lot of herbs and blood sausage in the gut.

The restaurant, or I should say shack.

The portion isn’t too large, and this is $2.50. Apparently when locals go, they give you half off. The sauce on top kind of tasted similar to jerk sauce. Very herby and spicy.

Extra order of skin. There were two types of skin, one was just skin (middle three pieces) and almost candy-like, and the other had a bit of meat attached (outer two pieces). This was the bomb! So flavorful, and the crunchiness was just right. You can also tell how candy-like it is in the picture below. I bet it’s from the belly area since it’s hollow.

Some kind of deep fried pork parts. Eating anything deep fried, without knowing what it is, is awesome.

No wonder this place is famous. My expectation was not too high. I thought pig might be a bit stinky, but I was blown away by how succulent it was, and even the blood sausage was very clean and flavorful. I don’t know what they do to it– from what I saw on the Anthony Bourdain show, they basted it with coconut water throughout, and takes about 24 hours, yet, it was super moist.

Amazing job Ibu Oka.  Hallelujah for Babi Guling!!!

IBU OKA
Jalan Suweta, Tegal Sari No. 2
Bali, Indonesia
T: 361.976345

I took my mom to Bali in December. I loved it. Being a visitor is good, since I didn’t have to deal with too much local crap. Bali, although thought to be one of the best resort islands, is yet a developing country. My friend Tonny and Corey moved there, and they have a fabulous apartment. Yet, their power goes off everyday if we use two air conditioners at once. Their internet connection is pretty spotty, and they have a very limited garbage collection system.

That said, my stay there was great. I learned my lesson of never laying under direct sunlight without using any sun protection though. After two hours at the hotel pool, reading stupid Nicholas Sparks’ Dear John (just because Channing Tatum was on the cover, and saw a preview when I went to see New Moon), I was completely burned. Like a lobster on steroids. Aloe lotion was nowhere to be seen, and hotel shop sold it for $20, which is the price of the local people’s weekly salary.

Anyhow, here are some of the food pics from the island.

Any Balinese restaurant you go, they give you shrimp chips and some kind of thin crispy thing with kafir lime on it. Bali version of a bread basket.

Oxtail soup. Meat wasn’t as edible as you see, but soup was very good.

Vegetable platter. Not memorable.

Prawns in spicy sauce. EVERYWHERE you go in Bali, prawns were never peeled, which was annoying.

Indonesia’s most famous rendung. Beef stewed in spicy coconut sauce. I love this thing.

Took Mom to the local market one morning. These are coconuts. The color is very different from what you think of as a coconut.

Snake fruit. Andrew Zimmern hated this, and it looks weird almost armadillo-like. It tastes like apple that hasn’t ripened. Hard to explain, but it has bitterness to it. I wasn’t a fan.

Various fruits.

Mangosteen. The smaller the sweeter, that I learned from the locals.

Pork being grilled.

No idea what these are. Some were gooey, and others were beany.

Local sweets. They use a lot of rice flour, hence the texture is very mochi-like.

Unripened bananas.

Fresh sardines. Mind you, it’s about 90 degrees outside, and though there was a roof on top of fish area, there was no ice, no A/C.

Some kind of tropical fish.

Just when we turned to poultry area, Mom gave up, and asked us to get the hell out of there. She was like, “This smells and looks horrible, I need to get out NOW!”

Chicken feet. Very demony.

Chicken (or what is this?) head, next to a beak and foot from another sorry creature.

Rambutan. I liked the flavor, but there was this annoying inside skin next to the pit. I bought this at Costco. Yes, Bali also has a Costco where you can buy a digital camera, fresh tropical fruits, and various souvenirs.

Nasi goreng. I like my nasi goreng with a sunny side up egg, but I bet it’s a bit too risky to do so here.

Bali food scene was pretty good and cheap. We went to Four Seasons for lunch once, and burger was $20, which is absolutely outrageous by Bali standards.

After everyday of soy/spice/rice/skewered meats, I was craving Italian food and ended up making bolongnese sauce at my friend’s apartment. One night we went to a fancy restaurant (it was too chic to take pics), yet the most expensive item was a glass of wine my mom ordered. Alcohol in Bali is EXTREMELY expensive, due to import taxes.

Yellowtail from Australia, which is $6.99 here, was over $20. And no one knew how to make a martini. I once ordered a vodka martini straight up with twist, and got olives in it and a side of lemon juice.

Still, it was a paradise. Though it was rainy season, we lucked out and it was sunny almost every day. I will go back any time.